when i clicked on vegan chef/pin-up superstar Sarah Kramer's website, I braced myself for a lot of weird, possibly "new-agey," veering into thinspo jacket copy. you know, that unfortunate positioning of meatless cooking as a hippy-dieter's dream: "being a vegan will make you 'healthy!'" "slender like a tapered amethyst crystal!" "you will save the world with your inaudible faery foot falls & sparkling new carob aura!" (and i only dabble in not eating things with faces. i cannot imagine how irritating it must be for super committed fat vegans to find resources that aren't blatantly insulting.)
i REALLY did not expect this:
“[Sarah Kramer's] delicious recipes have been terrorizing my waistline for years. She’s damn near Al-Queda’d my tubby ass into fat guy jeans.”
―Lin, Motive Company
i am pretty sure the last time i, seemingly unprovoked, got irrationally angry at the internet it was because i was feeling the intense reverberation of fail coming off those two sentences of text written by Lin up there. that's the kind of fail that clatters in the tubes relentlessly, just begging for a yelly all-caps takedown or a big stompy foot to blot out its existence, and crush it into pixel dust.
i'm pretty sure when you ignorantly evoke Al-Queda and/or terrorism to describe "eating delicious food" the entire internet should scream at you & boot you & then your computer should also yell at you before parking its hard drive.
i am definitely sure that if i was Sarah Kramer my first reaction would be to punch this person in the face and take their cookbook away so they no longer have to endure the militant assault on their body otherwise known as "eating."
how breathtakingly fucked up are our societal ideas of food & nourishment that reviewers think it's edgy & cute to frame cooking as an "act of war" & publishers/authors think it's an edgy/adorable way to sell books?
i've officially lost my appetite.